Glasses & Being Nonchalant

Recently I got myself a pair of red plastic glasses.

It has been giving me some problems. I was told that my astigmatism reduced to 50 degrees and the rest remained unchanged.

By default, it should be something worth rejoicing.

However I find myself quite hard to adjust to the new specs especially when I read a book.

The words became blurry and I suspect that I might be having some early signs of hyperopia. I told my mum and she was alarmed. She said how could it be and she felt disturbed. In addition, she called up my cousin who are 2 years older than me to check on her whether she had such a condition.

She became more worried when my cousin said no.

Then she asked me to make another pair and she will pay for it.

I took my old pair of specs which has the same degrees as the new one except that its astigmatism is higher by 50 degrees.

I can read the words in the book with my old specs at the same distance and when I put back the new one, the words became out of focus.

When I first wore the new pair of specs, I felt giddy and especially when I look at the sides of the specs... kind of look wierd as if the things that I see become "fish-eyed" view. The optician told me that I changed to a plastic one from a steel type and there is a difference in the distance because the plastic one would be nearer to your eyes compared to the previous one.

Mum told me to go for lasik which I feel quite apprehensive. I am not sure about lasik though my brother and his wife turned out fine after their operations.

Now I put back the old pair of glasses. I might want to go and make another one... maybe not a plastic pair.

Hyperopia is part of life. When you age , you get it some day.

Just like white hairs... When I first saw a few strands, they drove me crazy.

Now I am more calm now.

As for whether I starting to have hyperopia, it does make me feel kind of strange.

When I told ML, she chuckled and told me it is part of life and I should not be disturbed by it.

When I told FM, she said she might be having too and said she would still be my friend even I become more and more wrinkled. ( I felt like throwing her out of my window!)

When I told my mum, my mum's tiny beady eyes nearly popped up and her timbre shot up to G Major and railed how could it be.

I calmly reminded her that I am no longer the little child in her eyes.

My dad can't be bothered about my eyes but he is bothered with my level of ignorance and bochupness.

He questioned me last night why I seemed to be nonchalant when dealing with family matters. Most of the time I just stay indifferent and show slight concern over family matters.

I believe there are reasons to it. There were times I tried to argue over unfairness, I was only told to shut up and let the matter rest.

Yes, you resolved family conflicts but you cut my heart into pieces.

Have you ever tried to sit down for that very minute and listen to me?

Do you know that I have grown rounder, having more white hairs, more wrinkles around my eyes and perhaps going to wear progressive specs.

When I first told you that I have blood disorder, you refused to believe a single word.

Then when I started to faint and hyperventilate, you then realise that I having problems.

Do you know that a few years ago, I got myself into depression and nearly wanted to throw myself out of the window because I was being laughed "FAT and ROUND"?

Do you know that I was too dried up because every month I have to pay that much?

I want to tell but somehow I just couldn't...You might never want to listen, no time to listen, probably might not even understand...

Blood Disorder is genetic and there is nothing to be done but to live with it.

Hyperventilation occurs in the later part of my life. Something that I can't control it when it comes. But I can try to prevent it as much as I could. I must calm myself down, not to get too agitated, too disturbed and when I have this feeling that it is going to come, I must try to calm down and rest.

FAT and ROUND - I accept it with grace and control my diet in a healthy way. I dismiss people's sneering remarks and trash them out of my mind.

Dried out - control spendings, cultivate saving habits, be rational in buying, asking opinions with a money control buddy who can point out whether to buy or not to. (Cannot choose a spendthrift for a money buddy! )[FM and MK are good candidates if you need a money control buddy and if you want a superduper one, MK is champion when comes to shopping and food.She already sublimated (升华仙子）...LOL

If opera headpieces, wigs and pinky cute stuff, can "hire" FM...(She never lays eyes on those. LOL)

White hairs - can consider to dye your hair or just let it be part of growing process. Some of you already staying in the lead.

Wrinkles - part of growing process. (FM said I look cuter with wrinkles round my eyes and again I feel like throwing her out of my window. MK , you "catch" her okie, she is quite lightweight. You two can sing 18 miles together, LOL)

Hyperopia - part of growing process , let it age gracefully and graciously. I shall wait for you to join me. (LOL)